#Weddings on Twitter

We're on Twitter (@BridesButler) and often while executing Day of Coordination Services will send out a tweet or two of the wedding. I'll include pictures, updates and usually attach a hashtag so that my followers can, well, follow along. You must know though, that I always ask my clients first if they are comfortable with it.

Just this past weekend, I saw a tweet that was an RSVP to a wedding. At first, I'll admit, I was a little concerned. As a Wedding Coordinator, I do my best to aid my clients in staying true to traditions and proper wedding etiquette, but also know that times have changed and social media is a part of almost every one's life. I say almost everyone, because there's still a generation that doesn't use it (IE: Grandparents). You may beg to differ with me here, as even seniors are hip enough to tweet, pin and post - but when it comes to weddings; especially invitations, I suggest to follow the wishes of the couple.

If the invitation includes a self-addressed envelope with a pre-paid stamp, then you should fill out the reply card and send it the good ol' fashioned way. Including these pieces in their invite states that that's how the couple wants to be communicated with. Plus, invitations are quite expensive and adding a reply card with postage is an added expense that shouldn't go to waste.

Now, as I said before, modern times are here and we all need to get on the bandwagon - so if the couple is tech savvy (or wants to eliminate the cost of the reply card) they can request that their replies are sent via email (kimandkevin@gmail.com), phone or via Twitter. If the couple uses Twitter often, they might want to create a hashtag (#KimandKevinsWedding) for any tweets concerning their big day.

If the couple has a wedding website, they can include the URL in the invite and list the ways to RSVP there.  Note though, that you should only have 2 channels in which guests can give you a yay or nay...any more and you'll likely miss a few.

So, getting back to #weddings on Twitter - you can most definitely include your wedding on the popular social site like this Groom did (pictured), but I advise that you do with caution. You should be leaving the tweeting to others, because you should be enjoying your day as Hubs and Wifey. If you want your guests to tweet during your ceremony and reception, include that info in your programs. If you're really tech savvy, have a live stream of the tweets displayed on a screen in your reception venue. Like anything that is captured, these tweets will be a good reminder of the fun everyone had. Just be careful what you tweet (and this goes for Facebook too) - have respect for the couples privacy (not everyone was invited, so not everyone need the details), be courteous to the Bride (aka, post only flattering pictures) and refrain from using profanity - a wedding after all is a formal event - not a house party.

If you don't want everyone tweeting, you can say that as well in your program. Some couples aren't showy and don't want their special day posted to the masses whether it be on Twitter or Facebook. But, if you don't mind - perhaps you can ask a close friend or family member and enlist them as your "Tweet of Honor." Check out this article for more info on what I'm referring to.

So, to sum this all up - I suggest that you ask first and or follow the given instructions. If the RSVP doesn't say tweet your response, then don't. If you still want to tweet or post your attendance anyway, ask the couple first if it'd be okay to do so. Yes, Social Media is the future but, having proper social manners is not the past. At least not yet (here's hoping!)

Happy tweeting!

Facebook Wedding Etiquette

Facebook has more than 800 million active users. That's a lot of likes, wall posts, photo uploads and tags.
Like most things in life, there are certain rules to follow for certain tasks.
Do you know how to properly use Facebook during your planning process?

Here are some guidelines when using the popular social media site:



Announcing your engagement.

It's totally normal to want to shout it from the rooftops and Facebook is the perfect platform to do so. Update your status to "we're engaged" or "is gonna be a Mrs!" to tell all of your friends about the proposal. You can also upload a picture of your diamond, or if you've got pics or video of him popping the question, by all means share it.

Sharing some of the details.

Feel free to share your wedding date via a status update, but be sure to keep it simple and to the point. Not all of your 100+ friends on FB will be invited to your big day, so be a little sensitive to that. And of course, change your relationship status from "in a relationship" to "engaged!!"

A lot of Brides like to keep everyone in the know about their planning process, and again, feel free to do this with your status, but be sure not to go overboard with Bride Brain.

Sharing a countdown to your special day is okay too - just try to stick with the landmarks of one year, 6 months, 1 week and 1 day. Seeing a constant countdown for most, is annoying.

Proper etiquette would be that you don't post your Registry information online. Getting a gift for getting married is a privilege, and not a right. If people (guests) want to buy you something, they will ask you, your fiance, a family member or a friend.

After your wedding feel free to brag a little. Heck, brag a lot. Post your pictures, thank your guests and  change your relationship status from "engaged" to "MARRIED!"
Just make sure to keep everything positive, do not complain about guest behaviour, or how much your new mother-in-law got on your nerves.

Wrap up all your wedding talk within 6 months, or less. As much as you're stoked to now be a Mrs, there are other things that should be important in your life as well.

Invitations.

Do not by any means invite friends/family/co-workers to your wedding using Facebook. Send out a proper invite with an RSVP card for them to reply.

Bridal Showers, Stag & Does and Bachelorette/Bachelor Parties can have Facebook Event pages to keep everyone in the loop, but we still advise that you send out proper invites or personal emails to all invited.



Incorporate FB into your Bridal Shower with customized cookies!

 Vendors.

Use Facebook to help you find vendors - that is if you don't have a Wedding Planner. And be sure to "like" the Fan Pages of the vendors you book with. Not only does it show support, but you just might see your wedding crop up in their status updates or albums.

While we're chatting about vendors, make note that it is a big no-no to post anything negative about your vendors through the social media site. We know that planning a wedding can be stressful, but please do not use Facebook to bad mouth anyone. Send an email or pick up the phone and make a call instead if you're not happy with their services/products.

On the day of.

Do not log on Facebook on your wedding day. You can change your status and upload photos the day after, or even when you get back from your honeymoon. Enjoy the day and stay offline.

Posting as a guest.

Most of your guests will post pictures from your big day on Facebook and tag you in the pictures. If this bothers you tell your friends that. Some people are private and do not want memories from their special day to go viral. There's no harm in placing a small note on your ceremony programs that you wish to be shown any pictures prior to posting - or that pictures simply aren't posted. Remember though, you can't control what others post, but you can ask - there's nothing wrong with asking and making that request.

However, as a guest - do your best to be respectful to the newlyweds and only post pictures that display them in their best light. Do the same for members of the wedding party - no one wants to see the Best Man making out with the Grooms sister. Tisk, tisk.

Now, go on....log on to Facebook and "like" us - The Bride's Butler.