Good manners go a long way....

We're all brought up to know the difference between good behaviour and bad behaviour. It's amazing how a little good manners can go a long way....they can make someones day!

In one day, I was thanked by two previous clients and it made me feel great! Everyone wants to hear that they did a good job - that they helped someone achieve a goal, and that they were successful. It's the "thank you's" that I hear and read from my clients that is the icing on the cake for my services. Sure, seeing the details come together, the guests having fun and the Bride & Groom laughing are fantastic -  but to actually be thanked is another way I  feel rewarded.

Brides, I encourage you to send an email, card or even extend a phone call to all of your vendors after your wedding day to let them know how much you appreciated their efforts. Say "please" and "thank you".
Help others and let others know how they have helped you..because a little good manners goes a long way.

Bridal Shower Etiquette (for hosts)

This seems to be the time that many Brides are having Bridal Showers gearing up for their July, August & September weddings. A Bridal Shower is another festivity that is held to celebrate the marriage, much like the Stag & Doe, Bachelorette & Bachelor Parties and Rehearsal Dinner. The Bridal Shower is typically just for the Bride, although some couples now are having co-ed showers so the Groom can be 'showered' with gifts as well.

If you're a family member of the Bride-to-be or in the wedding party and are hosting a Bridal Shower,
here are some etiquette tips to help you:

1. Immediate family members should not host the event

Mothers, Future Mother-in-laws and sisters should not host the event. A cousin, Aunt, family friend or best friend should be the ones to host. Usually a Bridesmaid, or the Maid of Honour hosts the Bridal Shower.
The reason why this is frowned upon is because a Shower is given with the expectation of receiving gifts and it's in poor taste to host a party that between the lines is read as "give my daughter/sister some gifts please".

2. Only those that are invited to the wedding should be invited to the Shower

As mentioned above that Showers are a 'required gift' event, it is proper to only invite those that are invited to your special day. Ask the Bride for the wedding guest list, and perhaps go through it together with her to help build the invite list. If the Shower is a surprise, chat with the Mother of the Bride & Groom for guest names.

3. Write the Thank You card envelopes yourself

So many times we see guests arrive to a Bridal Shower and are instructed to write their name and mailing address on an envelope. We get that everyone wants an easy task concerning the wedding, but it's not very respectable to the guests. If the couple has sent, or will send a wedding invite to them, they already have their mailing address, so encourage the Bride to take the time to write the envelopes herself, or make labels. Think about the effort her guests have put into being at the Shower - they have shopped for a gift, wrapped it, signed a card, drove to the event, socialized with people they might not know very well, played corny games, watched her open up gifts and most likely dressed up. Don't you think that after all of that, the Bride (with your help) can write the envelopes?
This is one of our hang-ups...can ya tell? We're just saying that a little goes a long way.

4. Say Thank You

Not only should Thank You cards be sent within the week following the Bridal Shower, but the Bride should make sure that she says thanks to each guest whether it be after she's opened their gift, or as they are leaving. No one likes an ungrateful Bride.

5. Pony Up

If you are hosting the Bridal Shower, be prepared to spend some money. Most likely the Mother(s) will offer to pay for the shower, but you should still offer to pay for some aspects as the host. You can offer to have it at your home, or to provide a few menu items, or to pay for the decorations. No matter what, try to contribute to the cost of the event, even if the Mother(s) won't allow it.

6. Dress and behave appropriately

Do not try to upstage the Bride by any means. Dress according to the season and for the location of the event. If you are a member of the wedding party, keep in mind that you are an attendant to the Bride and are there for her. By no means are we saying you are her slave or lackey, but you should always keep in mind that the Shower and any other wedding related event is for her. Enjoy being the sidekick; the conductor in the background.

Do we have you nervous now about hosting a Bridal Shower? Don't be scared - it should be fun and exciting to host an event for the Bride.

Good manners should come naturally, and because for some they don't - we offered a few tips. Whether you are hosting a Shower or attending a Shower, we'd like to know what you think about these tips. Do you agree? Did you abide them? Have you witness them being completely ignored? We'd love to know!

The 3-Day Response Rule & Promptly saying Thank You

Did you know that according to proper wedding etiquette, you are to respond to an invite within 3-days? I’ve got to admit that even I haven’t been that quick with responding on more than one occasion.

Sometimes you take longer than 3-days to respond because…
A) You’re not sure if you’re available/can get the time off work, etc
B) If you’re single, you’re not sure to respond as a single or a duo
C) If it’s a destination wedding, you’ve got to factor in vacation time and money into your response decision.

Figuring out any of those options in 3-days is perhaps to some, a little unrealistic - but, etiquette, like any good manners, have rules. Sadly, in today’s society, rules are more likely to be ‘rule of thumb’ rather than proper protocol.

So whether you’re invited to a wedding, bridal shower, bachelorette party or rehearsal dinner, I suggest you do your best to respond quickly – at least within the week you received the invitation – 2 weeks maximum, but definitely before the RSVP due date! It’s unfair that hosts (mainly Brides) have to call their invited guests to confirm their attendance. As a guest, you’ve been selected among many and welcomed to take part in a joyous life event - the least you can do is let the host know that you’d be honoured to attend…or not.

My take on RSVP…. Respond Sincerely & Very Promptly. (This also means if you respond yes, keep your promise and go. No one likes to be blacklisted as the person/couple that didn’t show. Empty seats at a wedding are a big no-no.)

So now that we’ve ‘lectured’ or rather ‘informed’ the guests on proper etiquette – what about the Bride & Groom? They must have some rules to follow too, right? Of course!

Promptly saying Thank You to your guests for everything and anything that they do for you is a must. Some family and friends do more than just ‘show up’ to your event – they give you heartfelt gifts and cards, they offer to help you with DYI details and other wedding/event logistics and sometimes even if they aren’t invited to the wedding they offer to look after your pet and or your house while you’re at your wedding and your honeymoon. Any nice gesture needs a thank you.

It’s most manageable to write and send out Thank You cards as you receive gifts before your wedding. This way it doesn’t feel like you have a whole stack of cards to personalize and sign either before or right after your big day.

Thank You cards should be sent out no later than 6 months after your wedding, anything longer than that is simply distasteful. Plus, if you have a Bridal Shower (or sometimes 2 or 3), you should really strive to have Thank You cards for those gifts sent out before your wedding day. Usually guests give you a gift for your shower, and for your wedding, thus equalling two Thank You cards for two separate gifts – one from just you, the Bride and the other from both of you as a happily married couple.

Images from www.prettypaperinvitations.com
Post based on article found on www.weddingaces.com - "RSVP Today If You Please"