Monday, April 15, 2013

Planning perspectives...




Planning a wedding is the second most stressful life event, followed by the death of a loved one. Crazy, right? While planning your wedding, be sure to have look at it from all perspectives. From your point of view, to your mothers/future mother-in-law, even from your friends and co-workers. Not everyone will want to constantly hear about your plans, but those that love and support you will do just that - give you love and support. 

There are going to be issues during your wedding planning - difference in opinions - and I can guarantee it, there will be spats (between you & your Groom, between you & his family /your family and between you & your friends).

Here are a few issues that may arise and my tip on how to deal with them.

You and your Groom 'chose' to be with each other. People in your life are going to have their say/opinion - about you, about your ideas, and about your wedding. No matter what is said, the two of you need to stick together - this is very important. Family is family, you don't pick them - but you picked who you want to spend the rest of your life with - make that choice count.
TIP: If he doesn't have your back, and tells you that he feels like he's "in the middle" of any issues that arise - that might be a sign that he doesn't view the two of you as a unit. 
Working together should be easy and fun - not a battle.

May you remember that you can't please everyone, so aim to please just you and your Groom. 
Weddings are all about 2 people joining together - and not about what family traditions have to be included, where relatives should be seated & when to have the first dance. A wedding should only be about you and your fiance - your wants, needs, desires and dreams. Now, this doesn't mean you should be selfish and not be considerate of others (your guests) but it does mean that if your mother insists that you have your first dance to the song she and your father danced to and you don't like that song, then you don't have to. You are creating new memories and traditions so just be yourselves!
TIP: Be tactful and compromise the best you can. Try to put yourself in the shoes of others simply for a 'reality check' as planning your wedding can become all encompassing, but don't settle for a wedding that isn't what you always envisioned.

Don't sweat the small stuff. You can plan until you're blue in the face, but things will still go wrong on your wedding day. Of course having a Wedding Coordinator on site helps with this, but if you don't have us working with you, try to focus on the reason you are gathered - for a marriage, not just a party. There's no wedding without the vows.
TIP: Keep a clear perspective. Keep it simple. You, him, marriage, life. 

Try to keep your perspective about your wedding planning as sweet as possible. Be respectful, but don't be taken for granted. Be heard, but not overbearing. Be you - and if that's an issue for anyone, then they don't deserve to be a part of your special day.

Overall, try not to get too stressed out - and if you do, that may be telling you more than you think. Take a step back and look beyond the wedding, beyond the 'one day of celebration' and make sure that you're having a party for all the right reasons, because in the end - it is just one day whereas a marriage is forever.

Good luck!

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